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Sunday, February 24, 2013

Step Families and Elder Parents


Don't let the above image fool you, life within a step family is not all fun, games or smiles. In my case the step family occurred in early adulthood, and has been a grin and bear it experience :( Recently there has been a health scare for my elder pater. The efficient step-sister (since they aren't actually married is she actually my "step-sister"?) sprang into action. While I very much appreciate her attentiveness and support to the pater, I am having some difficulty with her attitude.  When I asked her to share information she used the age old put-off tactic "If you don't like what I'm doing you can do it yourself".  She also became "deeply offended" when I asked for a meeting on neutral ground.  Really? I sense control issues and a different perspective on sharing. Her assertiveness is quickly poisoning our minimal relationship and further alienating me from my pater ;(
It reminds me of a conversation with colleagues in the Library about a recent new book; Quiet The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking. The author, Susan Cain, talks about how the  "Extrovert Ideal throughout the twentieth century" has come to dominate and deeply "permeate our culture". Can you guess I'm an introvert and my step sister is an extrovert ;)
At the same time the mater has announced she is also considering a move into assisted living, so here we go with both parents, complicated by the step family. Yikes! Please bear with me as I have not had much time to stitch and may not blog as frequently as usual for the next wee while.





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